Improve Your Ratings

I am in the people business. I never looked at it that way before, but ever since I heard a noble man who I admired greatly and loved deeply once describe ministry in those terms, I adopted and regularly employ the phrase. The people business is an interesting business—primarily because people are interesting lol. In fact, there are a plethora of other descriptors I could use to describe us, but alas—to call us interesting is ambiguous but safe. LOL.

To excel in the people business, you must like people. I can only imagine how miserable it must be for anyone who works with people to not like people. Even for those of us who like and are called to work with people, the vast difficulties of doing so should not be underestimated. So for those of you who may be so called, let me share two of the best pieces of advice that I have ever received about working with people. The first piece of advice comes from Kent Keith. Written in 1968 and dubbed the “Paradoxical Commandments” I rewrite them on the inside cover of my Moleskin journal every year. They are worth remembering-probably even memorizing:

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered. Love them anyway.

If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives. Do good anyway.

If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway.

The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable. Be honest and frank anyway.

The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds. Think big anyway.

People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs. Fight for a few underdogs anyway.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight. Build anyway.

People really need help but may attack you if you do help them. Help people anyway.

Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you have anyway.

The second-best piece of advice that I have ever received about working with people I received from an unsuspecting Uber Driver. Mrs. Robinson and I recently traveled to Las Vegas to celebrate the birthday of our niece. Sydney is a fan of celebrity chef Gordon Ramsey, and wanted to celebrate her birthday at one of his establishments. So we took the short flight to Vegas and hopped in an Uber. En route to the restaurant, we had an amazing conversation with the driver. I love talking to Uber drivers. Because they work with people, they usually have a ton of hilarious stories about their daily adventures.

Michael was no exception. The conversation we had with him was even more compelling because he mentioned that he was from South Central Los Angeles. That discovery gave me the opportunity to ask him one of the questions that I always ask people from South Central Los Angeles: “Why exactly is South Central Los Angeles called South Central Los Angeles'?” (Side note: I still haven’t gotten a satisfactory reply but I enjoy the conversation that ensues once I pose the question. lol). As our discussion ebbed and we were exiting his car, Michael asked us to make sure that we gave him a great rating. And then he casually dropped a truth bomb that I wasn’t expecting. He said “yeah you guys were cool. I’m going to give you a good rating as well.” I froze. Mrs. Robinson and I looked at each other and then at Michael in disbelief. I assumed that we were both thinking the same thing: we had no idea that Uber drivers rated Uber passengers! Micheal said “It’s not something that we advertise, but it is designed to protect the drivers from rude, inhospitable and poorly tipping passengers.”

I. Never. Knew. That. But now that I do, it may explain why some people have to wait so long for an Uber LOL. They may not even know that they have been rated. In fact, although we maybe of unaware of it, we are always being rated. The power to rate is not one-sided. We have a tendency to think that our opinion is the only one that matters; as if our feelings, perspectives and needs are primary and even supreme. Interestingly, we also tend to rate ourselves higher than the facts warrant, a phenomenon called the Dunning-Kruger effect. This is the tendency that we all have to overestimate our skills and abilities. However, we should all bear in mind an axiom that was frequently on the lips of one of my mentors: “it ain’t what you say, it’s what they say. “ Whether you are in the people business or not (but especially if you are), this fact should be kept continually in mind.

Everyone thinks they are great. But here are a few questions worth pondering: how do you think you rate? How do you think your boss rates you? How do you think your children rate you? How do you think your spouse rates you? How do you think God rates you?

There was no one who God rated higher than Abraham. In Isaiah 41:8, God gives Abraham the greatest compliment that can ever be given to a man. He says:

But thou, Israel, art my servant, Jacob whom I have chosen, the seed of Abraham my friend.

Abraham never said he was God’s friend. God said that Abraham was his friend. God didn’t say that about any other person in scripture! And remember: it ain’t what you say. It’s what they say.

What do they say about you?

All of us should strive to improve our ratings…